Newton's Third Law

Continuing in my focus on balance, I believe that for every uncouth action a student makes towards me, there is an opposite action someone else will do to make me chuckle a little. This week the students were completely unruly. As a result, there have been a few incidences that have brought a smile to my face. Here’s a shortlist of some of conversations we’ve had starting this Monday:


Grading papers and being interrupted by students…
Student #1: Miss, did you know that Guyana is the safest country in the world?
Me: Really? Where did you hear that from?
Student #2: Our Primary School teacher.
Me: And did she say why?
Student #3: Miss, because we don’t get no snow like America or nuff hurricanes or earthquakes. All’s we get is a bit of breeze blowing…and some killings everyday.
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Sitting in a classroom chatting with kids whose teacher didn’t come to class…
Student: Miss you having a baby?
Me: You mean am I pregnant?
Student: Yeah
Me: No, do I look pregnant?
Student: Yeah Miss

5 minutes later…
Student: Miss, can we go for break?
Me: Yeah, it’s break time. You can go. I’m going to go too and get something to eat. I’m hungry.
Student: Miss you eat breakfast?
Me: Yes, but I’m starving already.
Student: Miss, you got a worm in your stomach?

Doubtful. Otherwise I wouldn’t look pregnant.
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Walking home from school…
Me: So [Student #1], what do you want to be when you grow up?
Student #1: Aeronautical engineer Miss.
Me: Really? Well you’re a very bright student so I think you would be great doing that.
Me: And [Student #2], what would you like to be when you grow up?
Student #2: A liar.
Me: You want to be a liar when you grow up?
Student #2: No Miss, a liiiiiiiar.
[I’m still confused and give the child a quizzical look]
Student #2 [in an American accent]: Miss, a laaaawwwyer.

Right. Same thing.
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Sitting with another teacher grading papers….
Me: I don’t even know how to grade this. I know the student worked hard because he told me it took him a long time to figure out what to write, but he didn’t even follow directions properly. And instead of signing his name, look what he wrote at the end of his letter.

"The End. Miss this is my litter. "

Teacher: If that’s his litter then you should just throw it in the bin.